Reuniting with "I Love Lucy"

After becoming reacquainted with some long lost episodes of I Love Lucy after a long unintentional hiatus, I've come to appreciate Lucille Ball's profound comedic and acting gifts all over again. Her expressions are priceless, her delivery is always on the mark, and she is both hilarious, annoying, endearing and lovable all at once. Perhaps I see aspects of myself in her, as many women and even men probably do, such as her devious grins while hatching a plot, her "bawls" of disappointment or fear of getting chewed out, her sheer determination to see a plan through (no matter how poorly thought out), and her ability to fight and make-up with those closest to her with no hard feelings whatsoever--and that's just scratching the surface.

A few other things I noticed this time around:

-Ricky is actually understandable when he goes on about something in Spanish (I think the problem was I just didn't understand Spanish when I was a child...).
-Sometimes the show contains some gender stereotyping that's to be expected for the time period (such as Lucy being expected to be happy as a stay-at-home mom), whereas often the show breaks with gender stereotypes for the sake of humor and possibly to promote other messages as well (like when Lucy tells Ricky he should spend his hard-earned vacation staying at home with her and taking care of their son, rather than going golfing and living it up with the boys).
-Everyone rags on Ethel for eating so much and maintaining a "fat" appearance when in reality she doesn't look particularly overweight at all by today's standards (or are we now more tolerant of her size because we see such extremes?).
-I wondered how many Latino actors were on a successful prime time show before 1951 (when the show first went on the air), and whether Desi Arnaz helped pave the way for actors of more diverse ethnicities to take center stage on popular shows after I Love Lucy aired.
-The "sleeping in separate beds while married" act still cracks me up.
-All four main characters are fantastic actors--even if the lines or plot lines are cheesy at times, they group still manage to pull of the episodes with style, one of the reasons the show's popularity continues even today.

A Different Kind of Job Interview

One thing I recently learned: job interviews in the restaurant business are a far cry from most other types of interviews I've witnessed. For my current job, I was interviewed by 6 different people. For a different position I applied for at the same time, they wanted to set up an interview for me with 10 (count 'em) 10 folks. The interviews I've had have always been very formal, requiring appropriate dress, my CV, at least three references, and so on. The interviews also drag on for hours at a time.

The few restaurant industry interviews I've witnessed have been completely different. There's no dress code, if you bring your CV then good on ya but no one will blink twice if you didn't bring one, and the chats with the head kitchen staff take 15 minutes at the most. Most people delve into your background and skill sets, but there's nothing intense or in-depth about the experience from what I can tell (although that probably depends on the position you're applying for). Obviously one needs to present themselves professionally and fit the criteria that the restaurant is looking for. I just recall how shocked I was at the flow, content, and time span of the restaurant interviews I was lucky enough to see because they were so unlike anything I had ever experienced. I kind of like that "badabing badaboom" interviewing style, and although I'll probably never experience that for myself, I can appreciate the simplicity of those meetings and the quick eye people must have to be able to size up a candidate in such a small amount of time.

Indecent Proposal

Why do some people feel the need to subject themselves to public humiliation? In particular, I'm referring to the guys who decide that it would be a super ingenious idea to propose to their girlfriends at some type of sports stadium. The first time, people probably thought, "Hey! What an original and romantic guy!" Hopefully the gal said yes, which often helps. However, now it's such a cliched way of proposing to someone, thousands of pairs of eyes are on you, you're probably also on national television, so what's to actually like about that kind of proposal?

You can't help feeling bad for the poor schmoes who muster every single ounce of courage to put their dignity on the line in front of a packed crowd, only to be totally rejected and their pride stomped on for the world to see by the would-be fiancee. I have to say, on the one hand, they guy is kind of asking for it with such an inopportune proposal setting. On the other hand, flat-out rejection is never easy to watch if you have any shred of empathy for other people.

Take that as a lesson guys--if there are lots of sweaty men running around trying to score points of some kind, it's probably not the right time to pop the question.

Cougars and Dirty Old Men

In your opinion, what is an "acceptable" age difference in a romantic relationship? Obviously, the priority is that the two individuals love each other and get along, but it's hard not to take note of how old each person is, especially if the difference is a marked one. Could you date someone twice your age? How about half your age? Does your answer to that depend on if you're male or female?

In an age when "cougars" (women who date younger men) are on the rise but still viewed with a hardened societal gaze, it's clear that gender norms have not evened out in this respect yet. Older men are still often seen as sophisticated, aged but in the sense of a fine wine, not a nasty cheese. Women in an older age bracket fall into the cheese category, not necessarily the Merlot. Much of women's sex appeal is tied to age and youth, unfortunate as that is since the fact of the matter is everyone gets older, and there's not a botox needle or liposuction tube that can stop that.

Thinking about my personal experiences, I seldom dated people who weren't my age, and the largest age difference is in my current relationship (a four-and-a-half-year difference). Dating someone younger was always out of the question because of maturity issues, and dating someone above that 5-year threshold would have just given me the creeps, I think. There's a reason why Oedipal complexes resonate with psychoanalysts even to this day, and it's easy to see how large age differences in romantic relationships could trigger that. Be that as it may, there are many people who enjoy a sizable age difference with their partner, and it bothers them not one whit. In fact, it works just dandy for them.

Obviously there's a lot more going on in a relationship than one's age, but age differences can certainly impact common interests and activities, as well as basic comfort levels within the relationship. At the end of the day, age is extremely relative, and it's best to keep that in mind when confronted with relationships that may seem strange age-wise at first glance--what makes a relationship tick is not on the surface and can't be spelled out in numbers.

Gender Roles and Pacifiers

One of my coworkers deserves credit for taking what one might consider "gender role risks" in the eyes of today's society. She has a one-year-old son, and in addition to his "normal" boy toys, clothes, etc., she has bought him girls' clothes, a pink pacifier, she keeps his curls long, and she lets him play with dolls. Her family is (not surprisingly) more traditional in terms of their idea of what a male child should wear and play with, but that hasn't phased my friend so far, something for which I admire her.

After discussing her decisions and gender role formation, we agreed on a few points: number one, babies aren't attuned to fashion and don't know what they're wearing or drinking out of, nor do they particularly care what color it happens to be. Number two, female children seem to have a bit more leeway when it comes to what toys they can play with. No one would necessarily think twice about a little girl playing with some cars, although it could potentially turn some heads, but see a boy playing with a Barbie and all hell breaks loose. Number three, it appears that at least some and perhaps the majority of fears related to babies or children breaking with gender role norms stems from a fear of homosexuality. Until more research is produced that confirms that playing with dolls and the color pink don't correlate with femininity or homosexuality, we'll most likely still see discomfort with children straying from society's deeply ingrained gender roles, even at a very young age.

Deja Vu

"Already seen." Why does deja vu occur? What purpose does it serve? If something seems familiar, and yet you're sure that you've never seen it or done it before, did you experience it in a previous life? Did you experience it and somehow forget? Did you truly never experience it?

I took to Wikipedia and found an explanation that fits with my instincts about deja vu:

"Scientifically speaking, the most likely explanation of déjà vu is not that it is an act of "precognition" or "prophecy," but rather that it is an anomaly of memory, giving the impression that an experience is "being recalled." This explanation is substantiated by the fact that the sense of "recollection" at the time is strong in most cases, but that the circumstances of the "previous" experience (when, where, and how the earlier experience occurred) are quite uncertain. Likewise, as time passes, subjects can exhibit a strong recollection of having the "unsettling" experience of déjà vu itself, but little or no recollection of the specifics of the event(s) or circumstance(s) they were "remembering" when they had the déjà vu experience. In particular, this may result from an overlap between the neurological systems responsible for short-term memory (events which are perceived as being in the present) and those responsible for long-term memory (events which are perceived as being in the past). The events would be stored into memory before the conscious part of the brain even receives the information and processes it."

Even though this explanation seems spot on and perfectly logical, it's still fun to consider the possibility of previous lives and remembering experiences from past lifetimes in this current one we're living right now. Who knows?

Creak Creak

Today the floor of our apartment seems creakier than usual. Before I could prowl around like a silent predator without making a peep, and now I can't even tiptoe without advertising my position. It's almost as if someone snuck into the apartment and is playing mind games with me (like in the movie Amelie when she goes into the grocer's apartment and changes the doorknobs, lightbulbs, slippers, toothpaste, and so on until the grocer goes slowly insane).

Either my mind is playing tricks on me or very soon I'm going to be paying a visit to our downstairs neighbors via a hole in our floor...